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Title: Texas Chainsaw 3D 
Release year: 2013
Director: John Luessenhop
Starring: Alexandra Daddario, Dan Yeager, Gunnar Hansen m fl
Distribution: Scanbox
Dear old Texas. Finally back on home ground where one can smell the scent of barbeque and half- witted teenagers. The seventh film in the series, Texas Chainsaw 3D flings itself head on, bulldozing the other movies and grabs the gauntlet from the finishing scenes in Tobe Hoopers original; delivering a brand new sequel. Quite a daring feat, one must say. It all opens in the best possible manner with a great 3D-romp featuring the best shots from the first film. You find yourself just sitting there, nodding in recognition, wanting to suck it all in. Bill Moseley (TCM 2) is elegantly edited in as Drayton (Jim Siedow passed away in 2003), making the transition into the new story as smooth as possible. The only scene I missed from the retro imageflow was Leatherfaces fantastic chainsaw-dance from the very ending, so let´s refresh our memory with my chainsaw-haiku that Gunnar “Leatherface” Hansen once expressed approval of:
Dark forest sleeping
The chainsaw blade cuts the sky
Deathdance in rain of light
Think it´s quite delicious if I may say so myself. Then Luessenhop´s film takes over and Leatherface´s house is barricaded by the whole Sawyer-family, including some new characters, while police cars screech to a halt outside and angry locals burn the farm to the ground. But a small baby survives and is adopted by an arsonist-loving family. Then we are fastforwarded to some sort of present time where the now grown up baby Heather (very well acted by Alexandra Daddario) finds out that she´s inherited a large house by her recently deceased grandmother in Texas. Together with a couple of friends she takes and old van and heads out towards the land of barbeques and chainsaws. And we know what awaits them there. A dark piece of Texas history.
Whilst watching the film one finds oneself nervously pondering; has it been hit by a chronological collapse? Let´s get to the bottom of this straight away. Heather should be in her forties, but in the film she is half that age, so we should find ourselves in the middle of the 90´s if we follow the setting in the first film. But in the 90´s there were no iPhones. Can such an important detail have been overlooked? Sure, the author and director behind Jason Goes to Hell, Adam Marcus, has had his wacky fingers in this particular pie, but this film smoothly bypasses any problematic questions in terms of chronology after the massacre. We are given no dates except August 19.
Except if one chooses not to view it as the third film (Moseley´s intervention). Heather´s age can also be the brainchild of some commercial brainbox with a desire to give an audience with money to burn an object of identification. Still, I would have preferred a 40-year old Heather. Played by Jessica Chastain. She´s hot now. And a redhead, which is perfect for Texas. But if we let go of the time aspect and failing logics (remember the confusion of Friday the 13th!) we´ve got, in spite of the tardy reception, a surprisingly well crafted and entertaining chainsaw-story.
If we take a little while to dwell on aspects less good, the new version lacks the grainy and documentary feel of the original (but to be fair, it also lacks the kitschy colour scheme we´re usually punished with), even though it still looks good. The pace of the film is heightened at the expense of the slowly increasing unpleasant and eerie atmosphere that was the trademark of the original film. Hooper allowed emphasis on time and details to develop, something Lussenhop rushes by a little too casually. His focus is more on muscle strength and jump-in-your-seat effects than suspense. It´s guilty of delivering some customary silly lines and behaviors, but nothing too irritating. The 3D-effects offered some amusing saw-tricks but not much else.
The big jackpot is the abundance of chainsaw in action. The feats of Leatherface are given a broader audience in the movie and there has been no stinginess when it comes to blood and revitalizing physical combat. The idea to let a police officer creep around in Leatherface´s cellar with his mobile phone on live-cam is so brilliant that I could have ditched the whole issue of chronology for a scene like that. But if you release Leatherface to graze the green pastures you could easily have amped up the scenes where Leatherface goes bananas at the funfair and the Ferris wheel a few notches. His pitching with the chainsaw would have made the former discus star Ricky Bruch green with envy.
”The saw is family” is a good old Texas motto, and one of the foundations of the film is that blood is thicker than water. The levels of tenderness displayed between Heather and Leatherface have not been matched since “The French Lieutenants Woman”. I was close to tears by the end. Tender moments between masked guys and hot chicks in push up-bras is an area left too unexploited.
Yet another positive aspect is the consequent and thoughtful ode to the original. Spanning from the casting of the old gang from the original to the scenography; where Tania Raymonde struts her stuff in the same red shorts as Pam, and a new take on the famous meat hook scene is made. This time the scene is revealingly shot from a side angle, unlike up front as in the original. The fun fair-scene also plays along nicely with the Texas-crowds hiding place in film number two.
But most important is Leatherface himself. Though I´m not quite sure if it’s a vintage or brand new leather-star. Perhaps human flesh keeps the body in shape. But that’s not interesting. In this film is name is Jed and he is wonderfully portrayed by Dan Yeager. Yeager is the best Leatherface since Gunnar Hansen. The physical movements with the slightly retarded and ungainly way of running, and the bizarre identity mix-up behind the mask carries Hansen’s hallmark. It´s possible that Yeager is more refined and well-trimmed, and in possession of some sort of incomprehensible reason that corresponds with the surroundings. He intercepts messages on the police radio and shows some nice emotions. Hansen’s Leatherface would have put the chainsaw in the radio or run of like a frightened rabbit. He only reacted to outer stimuli, had no power of thought and had a very narrow perception of the world surrounding him. Though the taste in clothes was perhaps a tad better and the masks a bit funnier – it’s difficult to measure the importance of IQ. But he was more of a fatuous enigma that was impossible to understand. Here you catch a glimpse behind the mask.
Just to round off with a few words on the casting and the wacky play with characters. The constellation of the family has varied throughout the years, so there´s not too much to say about that. That the lawyer, played by Richard Riehle was eerily similar to Paul Partin (Franklin) before he passed away in 2005 is hardly a coincidence. More like a discreet homage. To let Gunnar Hansen play the head of the Sawyer-family and Marilyn Burns (the only survivor in the original) take her place in the opposite team as a granny is absolute genius.
Circus Texas Chainsaw 3D has a big heart and has been made with a huge dose of nostalgia and humour, and can easily compete with Hoopers own sequel from 1986 and the remake from 2003. Still, the first movie will always be by far the best. Don’t miss out on the bonus scene after the end credits have finished. To avoid seeming poor in comparison we’ll finish off with a little Japanese renga poem as a bonus from Rysarnytt. A horror-renga.
Renga for Texas Chainsaw 3D
In a dream, he goes
through a ravaged Texas
with a crutch of skin
The smoke from the chainsaw
forming a blood red flower cloud
The rotten town
who cut down the family tree
had forgotten their heritage
Beautiful nymph in thinnest robes
ground the lie to mincemeat
One night fell a soft
moonlight over the slaughterhouse
which healed bloodlines
In the dungeon saws
remains of a sick world
